The Link Between Anger and Anxiety: Understanding the Connection

Anger and anxiety are emotions I know all too well. Unfortunately, I also know how hard it can be to manage both and live a calm fulfilling life. It’s not surprising to me that anger and anxiety are linked. Heck, my nickname in high school was “Angry Tony.” However, I didn’t have much progress until I learned how these two emotions are connected.

In this blog post, I’ll share what I’ve learned about the link between anger and anxiety, as well as some strategies that have helped me manage both emotions.

What is Anger?

Anger is an emotion you have no doubt experienced at some point or another. Depending on how mad you were at the time, your anger likely manifested on an emotional scale. If that scale were 1-10 then 10 would be explosive rage and one would be mild irritation.  

When you’re angry, your body can experience a range of responses including increased heart rate and blood pressure, muscle tension, and possibly perspiration and shakiness. Some people even cry when they are angry.

Anger often stems from unexpected situations that are perceived as unjust, unfair, or threatening. Everyone has different triggers, but some common situations often spur feelings of anger. These include:

• Feeling threatened like when you’re in an argument with someone who has an opposing view.
• Feeling powerless or out of control.
• When you are frustrated or disappointed.
• When you feel disrespected by someone else.
• And when you feel like your values or beliefs are being challenged.

Understanding what triggers you can help you manage your anger, which I discuss later in this post. But first, let’s discuss why we get angry in the first place. According to The Guardian, scientists believe that anger has been hardwired into our brains over millions of years of evolution. It is part of the fight or flight response used to identify and protect us from threats. So, even though anger can cause a lot of problems for people, it’s also useful. Now, let’s take a look at anxiety.  

What is Anxiety?

Anxiety, another common emotion is something that everyone experiences at one point or another. Note, this is different from having an anxiety disorder, where anxiety negatively affects your life. Anxiety is usually the result of unease or worries about past or future events. For a deep dive on anxiety, check out — The Ultimate Guide to Anxiety: A Deep Dive from Someone Who’s Been There

Just like anger, everyone has different triggers when it comes to anxiety. For example, a messy house causes me a great deal of anxiety, but it doesn’t faze my wife. However, like with anger, some common triggers induce anxiety including:

• Unmanaged stress
• Uncertainty about the future
• Fear of failure
• Traumatic events
• And major life changes

Sharing another commonality with anger, when you’re anxious, your body will experience several physical and emotional responses. This can include a racing heart, sweating, shortness of breath, or muscle tension. Emotionally, you may feel a sense of fear, dread, or worry. These responses are natural and normal but can certainly be frustrating.

Is Anger a Symptom of Anxiety?

So, is anger a symptom of anxiety? While the full answer isn’t simple, in short, yes anger can be a symptom of anxiety. When you’re anxious, your body is in a heightened state of stimulation and stress, and anger can become a coping mechanism when you don’t know how to deal with the emotions you’re feeling. However, anger is a problematic coping mechanism as it often leads to aggressive or destructive behavior that can damage relationships and make anxiety worse in the long run. Additionally, anxiety can lead to irritability or frustration, which can manifest as anger.

Anxiety can manifest as anger in a variety of ways. For example, someone with social anxiety may feel angry or defensive when they’re in a situation where they feel judged or scrutinized. Someone with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) may feel angry or irritable because they’re constantly worrying about everything, like me with a messy house. Someone with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) may experience anger when something triggers their past trauma.

Research has shown that there is a strong link between anxiety disorders and anger. People with anxiety disorders are more likely to experience anger, and people with anger issues are more likely to have anxiety disorders.

The Relationship Between Anger and Anxiety

While anger and anxiety may seem like two very different emotions, as I’ve discussed, they are often closely related. In the previous section I shared how anxiety is a symptom of anger, but anger can also trigger anxiety. This can be especially true when you feel guilty or ashamed about your angry outbursts, leading to worry about the consequences of your actions.

Essentially, anger and anxiety can become a feedback loop where the two emotions reinforce each other and make it difficult to break the pattern.

• Anxiety can lead to anger due to irritability, frustration, or worry.
• Anger can be a problematic coping mechanism for anxiety.
• Guilt and regret about angry outbursts can lead to worry and anxiety.
• People with anxiety disorders are more likely to experience these emotions.

The relationship between anger and anxiety is complex and can be challenging to manage, but with the right strategies, it is possible to learn to manage both emotions effectively.

How to Calm Anger and Anxiety

There are many different strategies you can use to calm both anger and anxiety, and they can be broken down into three buckets: prevention, in the moment, and long-term.

Prevention

Let’s start with strategies to prevent anger and anxiety. One of the best things you can do is add mental health activities into your daily routine. I explain how to do this in detail in my post, “How to Create a Daily Routine for Mental Health,” but here are a few examples:

1. Practice mindfulness meditation: Learn to focus on the present moment and observe your thoughts and emotions without judgment. This can help you to become more aware of your feelings and learn to manage them more effectively. Check out YouTube for different meditations or try an app like Calm or Headspace.
2. Exercise: Regular exercise can help to reduce stress and anxiety, and it can also help to release pent-up anger and tension.
3. Use breathing exercises: Counting your breaths, box breathing, or anchor breathing are great ways to be in the present moment and reduce stress.

Techniques for Coping with Anger and Anxiety in the Moment

When you’re feeling angry or anxious in the moment, it can be helpful to have some techniques readily available to help you cope. Here are a few you can try:

1. Count to 10: Take a deep breath and count to 10 before reacting. This can give you a chance to calm down and think before you act.
2. Use a calm-down timer: Find a quiet place to sit and set a timer on your phone for 90 seconds. During that time, notice where you feel your breath the most and follow it in and out.
3. Take a break: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a break and do something relaxing, such as taking a walk, listening to music, or practicing meditation.

For a more in-depth look at how to deal with anger in the moment, read my post, “How to Calm Down From Anger.”

If anxiety is a bigger problem, then my post, “14 Ways to Ease Anxiety When You’re Overwhelmed” can provide some help.

Long-Term Approaches to Preventing and Managing Anger and Anxiety

While coping strategies can be helpful in the moment, it’s important to also take a long-term approach to prevent and manage anger and anxiety. Here are some methods you can try:

1. Therapy: Therapy can help you to identify and change negative thought patterns that contribute to anger and anxiety.
2. Stress management: Identify the sources of stress in your life and learn strategies for managing it effectively.
3. Healthy lifestyle habits: Eating a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, and avoiding drugs and alcohol can all help to reduce feelings of anxiety and anger.
4. Self-care: Make time for activities that you enjoy, such as spending time with friends, pursuing hobbies, or exercising. This can help to reduce stress and improve your overall well-being.

By incorporating these strategies into your daily life, you can learn to manage both anger and anxiety in a healthy and effective way. It’s important to remember that managing these emotions is a process and it may take time to find the strategies that work best for you. Be patient and kind to yourself as you work through this process, and don’t hesitate to seek help from a mental health professional if you need it.