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For most of my life feeling depressed was my default. It felt normal to me, and any sliver of happiness I ever experienced seemed odd. I didn’t know how to cope with depression. Luckily, after discovering Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, I was able to break free from depression and change my mental health for the better.
That’s not to say I don’t still get depressed, I do, it’s normal to feel down from time to time. However, when I get depressed now it typically only lasts a few hours or a couple of days. My mental health routine of consistently practicing mindfulness, meditating, connecting to present moments, and regularly checking in with my therapist keeps me even-keeled. So, recently, when I felt depressed for more than a couple of days, I found myself frustrated and searching for ways to break out of it.
Depression is a serious illness that can alter the way you think and feel about the world. Even though the disease can feel like an endless pit of despair, it’s important to maintain your mental health as much as possible. The good news is it doesn’t have to be debilitating.
Whether you’re just starting to feel blue or you’re already feeling like you can’t get out of bed, I’m going to teach you how to cope with depression to get through the day and strategies to overcome it and live a more fulfilled life.
In this article, you’ll discover:
- What it means to be depressed.
- The difference between depression, laziness, and burnout.
- What causes depression.
- What to do when depression hits.
- And when to seek professional help.
What Does Depression Mean?
If you found this article, then chances are you already have a pretty good idea of what depression means and what it feels like. Whether you experience depression regularly, or the feeling is new to you, reviewing what depression is can help you better understand your suffering.
There’s so much stigma around depression that it can be difficult to talk about it. It’s not just sadness or the blues, it’s a serious, mental disorder that can change your brain chemistry.
People are often surprised to learn that depression is a disease, but it’s a very common illness. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), one in every 10 American adults report having depression. Although it can occur at any age, it’s most likely to affect people between the ages of 45 and 65, as well as women and minorities. Though with reports of anxiety and depression rising in young adults, and the fact that I had depression since I was in middle school, it’s safe to say it can affect anyone.
While no one knows the exact cause of depression, experts have identified some additional risk factors including genetics, grief, medical or mental health conditions, abuse, and trauma.
To further understand what it means to have depression, it’s important to review what depression is not.
Depression or Laziness?
Though depression is a disease, suffering from it isn’t always evident to other people. When you break your arm it’s easy for other people to see that you’re in pain. With depression, though you may be feeling intense sadness, others may just think you’re being lazy.
Laziness is a choice to not do anything. It’s something we all deal with, especially when the weather is bad. Or maybe you’ve had a long week and just want to veg out over the weekend. There’s nothing wrong with that, and it should be encouraged.
Depression is different, it is a chemical imbalance in the brain. Laziness is a response to that chemical imbalance. One is caused by choices and the other is caused by a disease. This is hard for people who have never struggled with depression to understand. They may try to force you to get up and do something or chastise you for laying around all day, calling you lazy.
Unfortunately, we can’t control how other people view us. My strategy for dealing with this is simply realizing that not everyone is going to understand. Just know you’re not lazy, and you’re not alone. Millions of people suffer from depression, and the more we talk about it the more people will get it.
Depression or Burnout?
So, we now know that laziness is a symptom of depression but figuring out if you have burnout or depression can be a little more challenging.
Burnout is typically the result of work-related stress from long hours in a job that’s not enjoyable anymore. It can also be from being repeatedly subjected to the same conditions over and over, like a pandemic that rages on for two-plus years.
Burnout is often related to a feeling of being completely overwhelmed like you can’t handle anymore. You may feel like there’s no way to keep up with your responsibilities, you probably don’t want to go to work, and your stress level may feel really high. You might even suffer from chronic fatigue, insomnia, lack of motivation, and reduced productivity.
Some of these symptoms are similar to depression, and it is possible to experience burnout and depression at the same time. However, they are not always connected and it’s important to recognize the differences.
When you’re depressed, you feel hopeless and down. It’s almost like all the joy is sucked out of the world and you feel like you will never be happy again. In my opinion, one of the best visualizations of what depression feels like is in the Disney movie “Inside Out.”
If you’ve never seen it, it’s a movie about how your emotions affect your behavior and each emotion is represented as a cartoon character inside of a human brain. These characters affect their human’s moods through an interactive console, and at one point in the movie, the console goes completely gray. The emotions no longer have any control, and the person feels nothing but numbness. The first time I saw this I instantly started crying because I had never felt so seen in my entire life.
Depression is complete despair and numbness, and it can lead to suicidal thoughts. If you feel suicidal you should call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.
Burnout is caused by external factors like overwork. Depression can have external causes, but it can also be caused by nothing. So, if you feel burnt out, you should check out my article on Burnout First Aid, for actionable steps to quickly reduce stress. If you feel depressed keep reading to learn about other causes.
What Are Causes of Depression?
Trying to pinpoint the cause of depression is important, and it’s one of the first things I try to do to overcome the feeling. Here are several common causes of depression:
Sleep Issues
Getting too much, not enough, or a lack of restful sleep can affect the chemicals in the brain, causing symptoms of depression. According to Johns Hopkins, people with insomnia may have a ten times higher risk of developing depression than people who get a good night’s sleep. As someone who sufferers from chronic insomnia and hypersomnia, I can attest that this is the number one cause of my depression.
To improve your sleep hygiene, try these tips:
- Use a sleep calculator to figure out the best time to go to bed based on when you need to wake up.
- Limit screen time an hour before bed. I put my phone in dark mode and don’t look at any blue light.
- Limit caffeine intake. Drinking caffeine later in the day can affect your ability to fall asleep.
- Don’t take long naps too late in the day.
- Avoid alcohol.
These are all general common-sense sleep hygiene habits, and for many people, they will make a difference. For people like me who have insomnia and trouble staying awake during the day you may need a supplement like melatonin to get a restful night.
I’ve tried every melatonin supplement under the sun and the biggest problem I’ve run into is grogginess. I started with 5mg and that was way too much. Then I tried 3mg and that was better, but I was still a little groggy. Then a friend recommended trying a couple of different brands. After some trial and error, I’ve found that Nature Made Melatonin 3mg is the best, and I never wake up groggy. They are also super affordable.
Stress
Too much, or the wrong kind, can also lead to depression. This is one of the reasons why burnout and depression are commonly linked. If you don’t cope with stress well, you’re at a higher risk for depression.
Medication Side Effects
While some medications are prescribed to treat an illness or heal a condition, they can cause side effects such as fatigue, mood changes, balance problems and nausea, which can trigger depression. Even antidepressants have been known to cause suicidal thoughts in children and young adults.
Food Sensitivities
Surprisingly enough, some research suggests that there is a connection between the gut and the brain. Certain food intolerances such as gluten and some preservatives can cause fatigue, mood swings, changes in appetite, immunity problems, and even depression.
Chronic medical conditions
Similar to how insomnia can affect sleep and lead to depression, other medical conditions can also lead to depression. This can include thyroid problems, cancer, fibromyalgia or chronic pain, heart disease, lupus, and diabetes to name a few.
Sometimes you can be depressed for no apparent reason. This was the case for most of my life. As I stated earlier, depression in and of itself is a disease and the chemical imbalance in your brain can cause you to feel down. This can be extremely frustrating, so let’s talk about how you can cope with depression.
How to Cope With Depression When it Hits
There are several different ways you can cope with depression. One of the first actions you can take is to determine the cause of your depression. If it’s something you can change then that may be enough to lift the depressive mood. For example, if you’re on a new medication talk to your doctor immediately. It may be causing your depression and your doctor may tell you to stop taking it. Another example is sleep issues. If you feel depressed because you’re tired all the time you may need to rethink your sleep habits or talk to a sleep doctor.
Regardless of the cause, there are some steps you can take to try and snap out of it, or at the very least lessen the depressive feelings:
Commit to Taking Some Action
Get dressed, take a shower, leave your bed. Whatever it is, one small action can help you build momentum. Just remember to take small steps, it’s hard to do anything when you’re depressed so be proud of even the smallest actions.
Go Outside
This is a harder task when you have an overwhelming desire to stay in bed, but if you can force yourself to go outside and get some fresh air you may experience a bit of relief. According to the American Psychological Association, nature can greatly improve mental health.
Distance Yourself From Negative Thoughts
It’s easy to feel bad about yourself when you’re depressed. Trying to create some distance from those types of thoughts can be helpful. To learn how to do this, read my article on how to interrupt negative thought patterns.
Get Some Laughs
If you’re depressed you will probably have trouble finding humor, but if you can laugh it may help. According to the Mayo Clinic, laughter can improve your mood. So, watch a funny movie, YouTube video or comedy special.
Leave the House
Go pick up lunch, head to a coffee shop, or just go for a drive. Sometimes a change of scenery is enough to brighten your mood. It’s easy to feel depressed when you’re trapped inside the same four walls every day.
Depression can come and go. You may be depressed for a few days or weeks and then get better. These suggestions may help you deal with it, but if your depression doesn’t leave and you can’t find any relief then you may need professional help.
When to Seek Help for Depression
When depression is chronic, meaning it persists for a long time, you should see a psychiatrist. If you don’t know where to find one, start by reaching out to your primary care physician. You should also seek immediate help if you’re having thoughts of suicide.
Even if your depression isn’t chronic, you may benefit from seeing a doctor and a therapist. Whether it’s for a day, a week, or longer depression is no fun. Don’t beat yourself up for feeling sad or blue. It’s ok to ask for help and accept that you need it. Depression is treatable, and you can save yourself from a lot of suffering by seeking professional help. That doesn’t mean that you will have to see a therapist or a doctor for the rest of your life. You may get better and decide you don’t need to go anymore. Your mental health journey is uniquely personal and only you can know what’s best for you. So cope with your depression, don’t just accept it.
I hope this article helped answer some questions you may have had. Please know that you’re not alone and you don’t have to suffer in silence.
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